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True story

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Australia were playing New Zealand at cricket and the Aussies were taking the piss as usual. New Zealand were collapsing and wickets were falling as the pressure got to them.
As a stocky New Zealand batsman came out to face Glenn McGrath the Aussie fast bowler, McGrath shouted "Oi! Why are you such a fat bastard?"
The New Zealander didnt even break his stride as he shouted back
"Cos every time i fuck your wife she gives me a chocolate biscuit"

He was bowled out
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